We Broke Up

We had a long talk and thought that things are not going to get any better for us, so we broke up for my parents. Mom and Dad will be thrilled.

The New Bastard Child

My parents are threatening to cut me off financially now if I don't break up with my boyfriend. That means I'll have to find a new quick way to pay for the rest of my school. I still love you mom and dad.

Oy Vey

Well I got off the phone with my parents. The visit at the boyfriend's parents home didn't go to well. My parents thought they blew what they were saying out of proportion. I know my parents and I'm sure they said a few things they should've just kept to themselves. It's like Romeo and Juliet here. The boyfriend is still out. Right now I'm just giving him his space because that's the last thing I need is for him to bring that shit on me.

He even jogged this morning. He didn't talk much but he jogged. He hasn't really talked about it all day at school. He seems to be keeping it all inside. His friends said that he's not talking to them either. Hopefully he'll be back a little happier. I hope he hasn't decided to take that drive and come back hours later.

I can't believe my parents. I ended the phone call today in tears. I felt embarrassed. Who are they to judge who I date? I am a grown woman and I can make my own decisions. And to say that I changed because of him? I've always been an outspoken person. They are just seeing him as a person that made me this way.

He's not answering his phone so I'm leaving voice messages. He hasn't acted this way in awhile. The later it gets I start to worry. I'm like running to the phone everytime it rings hoping that it's him.

Life

My boyfriend is going crazy and I'm calm. My parents and his parents are going to meet for the first time tomorrow. I admit that they are two different personalities but I think they will mesh well.

My boyfriend's friend from way back is back. He kind of dropped off the face of the earth for awhile but he's back. I've only met him once but he did have a great friendly first impression. He seems to be too good to be true.

I've been jogging with my boyfriend since Monday. He exceeded my expectations. I didn't even expect him to go out the first day. I think he's getting used to exercise again.

Accident

Waking up in the morning and having breakfast. You go to school with your boyfriend and just think of the fun you and your friends are going to have later. It's now dark. You go out to pick up one last thing and you're there with your friends to have fun. You go to the stop light. Traffic is already backed up so you just pull out enough to see if you are able to go out. The light starts to turn yellow so you know that you have no choice but to take the light or you'll be just stuck in the middle of traffic so you take it. No more than a split second making that turn you notice somebody is also trying to beat the light, but it's too late for both of you to stop. Both of your lives flashes in front of your eyes. You wake up on the cold dark pavement not able to move much. You are in a lot of pain. Your day flashes in front of your eyes. You wonder what you could've done differently that day to avoid the accident.

Last night I witnessed a bad car accident. It felt as if it was going in slow motion. The driver of one the cars was ok and was trying to help the other driver. When I looked closer at the accident, I saw a person on the highway. My heart just started hurting. I couldn't live with myself if I hit a person and took their life. The person seemed to be able to move a little but not that much. I'm assuming they were in the jeep and they were not wearing their seat belt.

The whole visual image of the accident is just haunting to me. You don't see things like that everyday. I've never seen anything like this before. I come from a very secluded area and near death experiences have never been so close to me before. I'm guessing that's why I'm taking this so badly. The accident happened no further than a few steps from the car I was in. That car could've been us.

I'm feeling better today. I called my mom last night and she calmed me down. It's something that I call an experience. I refused to read the paper to see the outcome of the accident but from my point of view of the accident and what people are telling me, nobody was killed. Thank you.

New Year Means More Objectives

So it's 2007 and we all have our resolutions.

My only resolution would be to stay happy another year. So far life is great and it seems to get better everyday. Thanks goes to my boyfriend who I love more and more each day. His spontaneous nature always keeps me happy. I've been through his really happy days and the days he wants to end it all. We were able to get through the hardships and push forward in a positive way. I Love You Baby. Hugs and Kisses.